Out now!

I Am the sand


Paperback: $24.99

eBook: $5.99

Susan Fuss’s psychological thriller, I am the Sand focuses on the effects of PTSD suffered by both the main characters. Concealed, and subject to appalling abuses and torture, an abducted schoolgirl is terrified that she is about to be killed. In desperation, she plans an ingenious and highly risky escape to save herself before it is too late.

Set in England in 2009, sixteen-year-old Chloe Thomas is kidnapped and held captive in a cellar, where she experiences severe brutality and deprivation at the hands of Captain Henry Peters, a local soldier referred for counselling when his violent outbursts are reported to his CO. The captain himself, is a victim of abuse throughout his childhood in an Irish Catholic boys’ home and industrial school. Recent traumatic experiences in combat have exacerbated his PTSD. Misogynistic, and psychologically damaged due to a combination of factors, the captain uses Chloe to satisfy his dark desires as he increasingly loses touch with reality.


If she is to get out, Chloe must tame the abject terror that holds sway over her night and day, threatening to overcome her and rendering her impotent and submissive to “The Monster”. To survive the ordeal, she dissociates from her sense of self, fleeing to safety on a lonely beach where she is the Keeper of the Treasure in a hidden cavern. Here she becomes one with the sand which clothes her. In the cave she can feel whole, safe and unsullied.

10% of sales to go to charity

After a particularly harrowing night tortured by Peters, and realising her death is imminent, Chloe subdues the terror enough to take control and escape in dramatic circumstances. In the aftermath, both victim and perpetrator must deal with their personal demons. The gradual disintegration of mental health during the captivity, and the impact of trauma, past and present, on both Chloe and Peters is seen to be startlingly similar.


Is it possible for victims of severe PTSD to recover from such shocking experiences?

10% of sales to go to charity

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